Shorts & Stuff, Volume I

21 05 2012

Shorts & Stuff is a summer lifestyle installation brought to you by me!
These are pretty things I love in my life that you should love too.
To see all the pretty things I love daily,
visit Gallivanting & Grass.

Volume I explores some of my favorite things that have been helping me get pumped up for June & beyond– my latest favorite pair “can’t live without” shorts, light teals & lighter wine, subtle tans & surf readings.

[click through for full view]

1. Wildfox Friday Night Shorts

I got these shorts for Coachella & they’ve been impossible to take off since! The color is a perfect light, pastel aqua that goes pristinely with peaches & nudes & tans. Plus, the fringe & the pocket are to die for. I don’t know about you, but I’ve ruined about a zillion tiny men’s Levi’s trying to pull off this same look & at this point, I’m just going to leave it to the professionals.

2. Agent18 Mint Chevron Case

Have you even seen Tumblr in the last year? Everything is zig zagged & mint. So why shouldn’t your phone look just as cute? Agent 18′s cases have been saving my life for almost a year now & I absolute love this one. It matches my whole life & I get a bazillion compliments on it. Not only is it super durable, but the case is still nice & slim so you can fit in your tiny back pockets.

3. Thomas Pynchon’s Inherent Vice

I’m reading this book right now & I love it. It’s about a private investigator stoner-surfer in Gordita Beach (nom de guerre of Pynchon’s actual residence, Manhattan Beach) during the end of the sixties. I’m only about half way through it, but it involves this whole real estate scandal & a bunch of details you can gather from its many detailed summaries from various internet retailers. What I’m here to say is I love it just for the way it’s written. I get high on its obscure & outdated beach slang. I love authors that write like they talk, or rather write from the environment of their characters since I’m pretty positive Pynchon’s other works don’t embody the vernacular of Inherent Vice‘s nearly burnt-out protagonist, Doc Sportello. I also die for Pynchon’s incredible grasp on the art of detail. He spares no adjectives; creating long, looping descriptions that mimic the book’s overall psychedelic & spontaneous nature.

4. Dr. Haushka Lavender Bath

Do you like painkillers? Me too. Do you have them readily available? Me neither. But fear not my friends! We have Dr. Haushka’s Lavender Bath oil. A couple drops of this in a hot tub is like eating half a 660 MG Vicodin, which we can agree is better than no Vicodin at all. And let me just say that before I got this stuff, I was not a “bath person”. In fact, I despised baths & was generally disgusted by the idea of hanging out in my own filth sans jets (because for some reason, jacuzzis on the other hand have always been widely accepted & loved in my life). But Dr. Haushka has changed my life, and for the better. Now I love getting my soak on & listening to music & trying to figure out my summer goals in a cheap notebook.

5. Hawaiian Tropic Island Radiance Tanning Créme

My motto is, summer only ends if you let it. And a very important part of staying summery, is staying even just a little bit tan. Gotta keep that color! This is my absolute favorite self-tanner. It smells awesome & I’ve never had a problem with streaking. The only problem I’m having is finding this stuff. This season my Rite Aid doesn’t have it & I’m beyond pissed.

6. Opala Vinho Verde

This wine is so delicious! It’s super light with just a hint of sparkle, perfect for sunny afternoons spent on blankets in the grass or on your couch with the AC blasting. Either way. I like it all ways actually. You can get it for $8 at Whole Foods.

7. Herschel Pop Quiz Backpack

Guhhh, I don’t have this but I want it so bad so I can tote around all the stuff I have mentioned in this post, plus a bikini & my laptop (you can never be too prepared).

8. White Fence (Tim Presley)

White Fence is capable of quenching any taste you’re thirsty for. With the finest mix of garage, punk & retro influences Tim Presley has put together what is quite possibly one of the best independent bands of our time. I’ve said this probably eight hundred times & I’m sure there are some of you who are like “Get the off this dude’s dick” but here’s the thing, as long as White Fence puts out amazing albums (which they have three of just this year alone), I’m going to be riding the fuck out of them.

9. Stila Silk Shimmer Gloss

Ah! This lip gloss is superb. I’m the kind of person who applies lip gloss every seven to ten minutes so I need something that looks pretty & won’t dry out my lips. This Stila gloss doesn’t lie– it’s mad silky. It makes my lips feel like I could make out forever, which is not really something I have the opportunity to do ever, but I like knowing that under the right set of circumstances, I could fucking kill it.

And then don’t forget…
Iced coffees, patios of all sizes, big floral pillows, cab rides, Apples to Apples, slumber parties, Cruel Intentions, pouring too much tequila & soft white sheets.

What’s been getting you excited for summer?





Wildfox House, Coachella Two Thousand & Twelve

25 04 2012

A couple weeks ago, I was fortunate enough to be invited to stay with my best friends Meredith & Kim at the Wildfox House in Palm Springs for Coachella. I almost peed my pants when it turned out to be one of the original Alexander Homes, complete with a butterfly roof line. No one else cared, I’m fine with it. We didn’t see any live music, but we did drink from noon until 5am, partied our little butts off around pools, rolled around in pristine lawns, had the best slumber parties & quoted Seinfeld in quiet moments.

It was one of those weekends
that made me feel like the luckiest girl in the universe.

Despite my personality being on point while drunk,
my manual focus is still getting used to the lifestyle.

Here are some of the pictures that survived.

Palm Springs, April Two Thousand & Twelve
Wildfox House with my best friends

All photos were taken by me on a late seventies’ Canon AE-1. Feel free to share, just please credit. Visit the set on Flickr here.





For That Special Marissa A. Ross In Your Life: The T&tT Holiday Gift Guide

30 11 2011

There is only one thing that comes close to how much I love Summer
& that is HOW MUCH I FREAKING LOVE THE HOLIDAY SEASON!

I love Thanksgiving, I love all of December, I love decorating shit, I love making ornaments, I fucking love love love Christmas music, I love themed cocktails, I love wearing big coats over tiny dresses, I love being wished a thousand happy Hanukkahs, I LOVE Christmas & I sort of love New Year’s.

But I hate shopping during the holidays.
That’s the fucking worst idea ever.
Especially when you don’t know the person well.
You’re like clawing your way through the mall,
navigating through a Disneyland crowd on PCP.
How are you supposed to see that perfect gift
while you’re busy getting struck head-on by 4-wheel drive strollers?!

So, in the spirit of the season, I decided to make a Holiday Gift Guide so that moms, dads, friends & unacquainted cousins could get an idea as to what to get that very special, weirdly sophisticated dumb asshole that drinks too much in their family for Christmas/Jewish Week this year.

So, press play on this delightful Dent May holiday jam & get to reading! You only have like, 26 days left to figure out how to get all this shit under my tree.


Bandit Cabernet $8

Wine in general is a good idea but a personal affordable favorite is Bandit boxed wine. It’s delicious & more eco-friendly so you can drink it & pretend you’re not such an asshole. Also: there is 33% more wine because it’s in a box. Also: great for Ross testing!

Wine Away $18.50 (pack of two)

THIS PRODUCT HAS BASICALLY SAVED MY LIFE. BY LIFE I MEAN MY CLOTHES, MY FURNITURE, MY DIGNITY & PARTICULARLY MY BEDDING. THANK YOU WINE AWAY!

Jeffrey Campbell Lita’s $159.95

Give your spritely little friend the extra five inches she’s always dreamed of with these incredibly cute, chic & incredulously comfy Jeffrey Campbell’s. If we’re going to be real here, these shoes have changed my life & I have been stomping around in them for weeks acting like I’m the queen of something.

Sachajuan Volume Powder $34

I was recently introduced to this stuff when my hairdresser used it for my last photoshoot. Contrary to popular belief, I actually have very thin hair, just a lot of it. This volumizing powder not only gave me the perfect amount of poof, but also gave my hair that awesome just-outta-the-ocean feeling & I didn’t have to wash it for days (which means a lot to hustlers with little time on their hands).

Is Everyone Hanging Out Without Me? by Mindy Kaling $25

I don’t know what you people want from me. I will continue to rave about this book for forever. Buy it for someone this holiday season. You have to. Not gifting this to a lovely lady is a fucking crime against humanity.

R29 + Samudra Beach-Inspired Pouches $60

Okay. OK. These are actually just on my Christmas list since @etoilee8 tweeted them at me this morning & I was just like, “DAMN. SOMEONE BETTER GET ME ONE.” Like, for real. A beach scene. That I can put stuff in. What more could I possibly want in the universe besides a ranchion?! (Note: A ranchion is a ranch-mansion, which is like a mansion but a little more cozy & welcoming.)

CSA $25 – $600

Since you pay weekly, this could be either pretty cheap or really expensive but anyone who reads me on the reg’ knows I’m obsessed with Community Supported Agriculture. I rep them so hard on the internet & in real life. Basically, for $25 a week you get two bangin’ big ass bags of local, organic produce. That is so much cheaper than buying it at the grocery store! And $3 of every purchase goes to your local school district. Plus you just pick it up. I’ve heard that this is best in California where we grow tons of stuff year round, but I know my friends in New Mexico love it too! Great for parents. They will think you’re looking out for your own health & not drinking yourself to sleep on a regular basis.

Wildfox Runaway Donovan T $92

Did you read the thing? Hello, duh, yeah, this is for Marissa A. Ross’. It’s very reminiscent of my favorite HST quote plus I live in Wildfox because I’m a spoiled bitch & it’s the best. Give your favorite spoiled bitch this shirt so we can be spoiled bitches together (until I steal this from her & we’re mortal enemies).

Herbal Ecstasy $20

I just got this in Santa Cruz at the Happy High Herbal Store. They specialize in “legal party alternatives”. As someone who has enjoyed (not saying I condone!) recreational drug use in their day but doesn’t have the time to deal with a three day depletion of serotonin, I was intrigued. Does it work? No idea. I haven’t tried it yet but who cares? Even if you don’t orgasm off sucking on Skittles & rubbing Vick’s Vapo-Rub all over your face, at least you will be putting a good laugh in someone’s stocking.

Betsy Johnson Darling Diamond Thigh Highs $18

I just think these are really versatile in the fact that they could go from seduction-to-snuggle. First, you have them on with some pumps & a cute dress. After everyone loses interest in clothing & disregards their shoes & ruffle some sheets, you can throw on a comfy sweater & your cute undies & hit the couch in these. They’re like pants but sexier.

T by Alexander Wang Knit Crew Neck Pullover $195

Who knows? Maybe this is the comfy sweater I was talking about! I just think every girl needs a good black sweater they could wear everyday if they wanted to. I like to buy mine a size or two too large & feel like I’m swimming in warmth.

Wool Blanket around $30

I’m sure I’m being totally not politically correct in calling these wool blankets “Mexican Blankets” but I feel like you totally know what I’m talking about now. I got this amazing one in my favorite color at my local hipster “general” store. I keep it on my couch where I snuggle it for hours while watching Storage Wars.

Demeter Suntan Lotion Perfume $6 – $39.50

It’s like being at the beach all year round! Okay, so this stuff doesn’t smell like coconut but it does smell like your mom’s Hawaiian Tropic from the late eighties which I LOVE. All you’ll need is one of those one pieces that barely covers your crotch & completely misses your hips & you’ll be set.

Hennessy $35

Because all us egomaniacal fiends really want to be rappers on the inside (sometimes).

Crosley Record Player $100+

I got one of these a couple years ago & I love it. They’re super stylish plus they come with speakers built in! Sure they kind of suck in terms of speakers but awesome when you don’t want to throw down for a whole sound system/want a gift for a girl who probably doesn’t give a shit about sound systems anyway.

The Doors, Self-Titled on vinyl $8+

I’m sure there are people out there frowning on this choice, but seriously, fuck you. It is not my fault that you have never been drunk on a hot summer day in Los Angeles. Anyone who doesn’t “get” The Doors, that’s all they need to do. Get super wasted in the heat of LA & suddenly The Doors make sense. I know this because everyone in LA is not from LA and they’re like “WTF” until I show them the light. This is my personal favorite Doors album. It’s so classic, super sexy & mad fiendish. I just want to get into a bottle & a bunch of trouble with it. Another great choice: Waiting For The Sun.

Women by Charles Bukowski $16

Tangents about booze & sex. Can’t get much more Marissa A. Ross than that.

MAC Wet, Wild & Wonderful PlushGlass $18.50

I CAN’T LIVE WITHOUT THIS! It’s my favorite lipgloss in the world. It’s not too dark with the quintessential amount of glimmer & tons of shine. Only downsides: it will ruin wine glasses & the faces of those you’re making out with. Oh well. Occupational hazards exist, ya’all.

Corkscrew Keychain $3 – $10

Do you know how many times people like me are in situations where they need a corkscrew but left the travel one from the Hilton in their other clutch? ALL THE TIME. That’s why this is a really affordable & smart gift!

Family Members’ Left Over Pharmaceuticals

For you broke, soulless types with access to your elderly-people relatives’ medicine cabinets or recent wisdom-teeth-losing younger siblings who haven’t discovered the recreational uses of Vicodin yet.

So, that’s it!

Unless you know where to get a bikini made of a hundred dollar bills?





Now I’m Gonna Let You Finish But…

9 12 2009

WILDFOX IS THE BEST CLOTHING LINE EVERRRR !!!

& today they released their spring 2010 vid.

They are honestly the most comfortable & most adorable shirts EVERRR !!!

You know how some people have a “good side”?
Well, I only have “good tees”.
& they are Wildfox tees.
Seriously, it’s the only way I’ll be photographed.
I’d show you but then in like two days once I’ve done laundry again you’d see me in one, you’d be like, “zomg doesn’t she have anything else to wear, my mom was right she’s SUCH A BUM.”
& yes, mothers usually are right
but on the inside, I know you’d be jealous.

But the great thing is, you don’t have to be jealous because you,
YES, YOU!
Can get your own Wildfox right huuuurrrrrr.

I’m starting a gang, it’s called xWILDFOXxCOREx
& all we do is look fucking classy
supporting awesome girls with impeccable taste
reppin’ their bangin’ tshirts.
Let me know if you’re in, I’ll put you on the mailer. xoxoxo








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