A Tangent About “My Dip”.

12 12 2011

I’ve been trying to replace “my jam” with “my dip”.
I decided to do this because quite frankly,
it’s a better fucking choice.

I am guessing– with confidence– that on average, people love dips more than jams. I mean, I threw myself an entire birthday party around dips where I did not ask for presents, I asked for everyone to bring a dip. My “David Putty Party” was a serious success that I don’t think a “jam party” would have been. Jams are great, don’t get me wrong, but I feel like they’re more for bread and Brits. (Right, tea time? Am I just being a dick right now or does anyone else feel me on that?)

Dips are for everyone!
Ranch dip, bean dip, artichoke dip, sour cream & onion dip, SEVEN FUCKING LAYER DIP, spinach dip, guacamole, chile con queso, straight up salsa, cheddar ale spread, jalepeno crab dip! AND THAT’S JUST OFF THE TOP OF MY HEAD! IF I SPENT AN EXTRA FIVE MINUTES ON THE INTERNET I COULD BLOW YOUR FUCKING MIIINDS WITH THE SORT OF DIPS I COULD FIND! NOT TO MENTION, FRENCH ONION!

(I don’t like french onion really, so please to the four people who brought it to my David Putty party, can three of you bring more 7 layer dips next time? Thanks.)

Unfortunately, despite all reasonable logic
& my immaculate enunciation
(when I’m not drunk),
everyone keeps thinking I’m saying,
“DAMN, THAT’S MY DICK!”

Which is, painfully, not the same as “my dip”.

“Dip” is better than “jam”,
but “jam” is better than “dick”.

:|

I am sullen, but not defeated.
I will be a trendsetting slanguist one day.

Mark my words,
MARK MY DIP!

[Currently Listening 2 Friends Records 2011]


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Jarring: TV on the Radio

10 10 2008

The Jam: TV on the Radio’s Dear Science

Take one of the finest experimental bands and let it soak up some pop for two years.

Tastes A Lot Like: Indie 103.1 Jam- acceptable by the masses while still tasting a bit unique.

On August twenty-third, TV on the Radio released a much anticipated (well, I know I was excited) new album by the name of Dear Science. I got my hands on the album immediately but had a hard time deciding how I felt about it. My first thought: “Dude, did TVOTR collab’ with Chromeo?” I was put off by the electronic pop intifada, waiting for the album’s ambiently unsettling “Dreams” or an indie-rock-explosion showstopper like “Wolf Like Me”, neither of which came. Their previous albums all had tracks that absolutely blew me away whereas Dear Science just sounds like someone took the core of TVOTR and layered it with pop. “Crying” sounds like it should be on Fancy Footwork and “Family Tree” sounds like a Coldplay song. It’s TV on the Radio… but not.

To enjoy this album I have to look at it completely objectively and not compare it to their monumental albums such as Desperate Youth, Blood Thirsty Babes, which to this day still leaves me in awe. Looking at it like it’s the twelfth album on the Billboard 200, yeah, it’s a good album. I can put it on and dance a bit. It’s good for driving. But would I consider it a highlight of my Ipod? No.

I’m not necessarily bummed but I’m not impressed.

I read a review that basically said the album reminds them of a friend that they hadn’t seen for awhile and had definitely changed but still was the same person. I think that’s an accurate description. But those are the kinds of people you comment on Myspace because you don’t actually want to talk to them in real life. Sooooo… yeah…


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Jarring: Jenny Lewis

2 10 2008

The Jam: Jenny Lewis’ Acid Tongue

Take a brilliant mind covered in red locks and empty its contents. Add angelic, truth oozing vocals and smart words. Strain the century for the best musical styles. Mix with focus and Laurel Canyon parties. Stir in the simplicity found in the intricacies of life and squeeze out some genius to top it off. Wrap it up in cuteness.

Tastes a lot like: Jezebel Jam- it sounds like it’d be shameful but it’s just sweet and delicious with a slight bite of tart to keep you coming back for more.

Jenny Lewis is back with her second solo album, Acid Tongue, and proves again she is one of the most prolific and talented female songwriters of our time. Between her single-handed stints and her Rilo Kiley tours, she has released seven albums. SEVEN. Holy hell, she ain’t playin’. She is out to conquer indie-rock-folk and to be quite frank, I think she will.

Acid Tongue isn’t quite like Rabbit Fur Coat but it is absolutely captivating and definitely an amazing sophomore album. I couldn’t tell you which I prefer; one is smooth and dreamlike while the other is still sweet but with a whole lot of zing. I do have to say the variety of musical stylings featured on Acid Tongue are astounding. From knee-slapping country crooning to psychedelic guitar riffs to ragtime-esque piano plunkings, the album takes you all over the place. One might suspect such an eclectic collection of sounds to come off messy but it’s entirely cohesive, brought together by Lewis’ personality infused feminine vocals. Another amazing aspect of the album is the repertoire of more than respectable guest artists. Both sides of She & Him, M. Ward and Zooey Deschanel, add a helping hand as well as Elvis Costello, fellow Rilo Kiley vet Jason Boesel, Chris Robinson of the Black Crowes as well as her BF, Jonathan Rice. Jonathan also helped produce it alongside Rilo Kiley producer Jason Lader and Farmer Dave Scher. And her lyrics… oh, sheesh, forget about it. They are well crafted with an innate intelligence and beauty. They remind me of a pearl necklace (an actual pearl necklace you sick fucks- go watch pterodactyl porn)- the perfect words strung together so majestically to compliment the structure of her sound. She never comes off whiny or cheesy or anything except absolutely honest and raw and poetically poised. I personally love the title track, as she chastises herself for being a liar and sounds like a god damned angel. Oy vei, if only my confessions sounded so lovely.

I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again, I really don’t like many female singer/songwriters. For the most part I just can’t get into it- whether it is the subject matter or their voices, it just doesn’t fly with me. But Jenny Lewis is the quintessential female musician. She is strong yet graceful, showcasing her ideas and talents with a feminine force that demands respect and draws out the utmost of adoration.

Jenny Lewis is a dreamboat of musical genius.
End of story.
& I’ve been in her company: she is the sweetest thing this side of the candy isle.

Catch her on tour with Conor & the Mystic Valley Band or with Michael Runion or another Riloer, Pierre De Reeder, all this month.


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Jarring: Dri

15 08 2008

The Jam: Dri’s Smoke Rings

Take that feminine voice from The Anniversary. Add Art in Manilla. Bring to the boil with fluid beats. Mix in memories of the tropics. Smooth textured vocal stylings. Add to mix and stir with fringey melodies. Mash up good “girl” lyrics. Bottle up with a pretty face and a true stage presence.

Tastes a Lot Like: Passionfruit Jam- you want to say you’ve tried it before but you never have. And when you do, you love it for it’s surprising consistency and menagerie of unexpected flavors.

A great many bands are discovered when you are not looking for them. Last week I attended a Conor and the Mystic Valley Band concert. I was intrigued by their opening act- a pretty blonde singing passionately behind a keyboard. I stopped her after the show to express my enjoyment and she graciously said thank you and handed me her new full length, Smoke Rings.

Adrienne Verhoeven used to be apart of Vagrant’s The Anniversary. The band broke up for “a number of (undisclosed) reasons” in 2004. Adrienne ran around with Orenda Fink and Neva Dinvoa for awhile before compiling a collection of her own work.

Smoke Rings is a compelling collection in the fact that it is consistent yet exciting. Each song is definitely a part of the entire entity- all have edgy rhythms and heartwarming, layered vocals. The opening track “Two are One” is accented with a number of random beats- such as clinking on glasses- by the third you are taken to India and then suddenly you’re in a 1950′s dreamscape. She has mastered an art of adding influential elements without losing a core sound. Her lyrics go from poignant and heart-breaking to youthful and fun-loving. She’s never the “girly” singer but still touches upon a specific sense of femininity. She ends the album with the title track, a lovely rendition of the 1930′s classic, “Smoke Rings”.

It’s been in my cd player since last Tuesday.
That says something in this day and age of ipods.

Check out Dri on tour with Conor and the Mystic Valley Band.


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Jarring: Conor Oberst

7 08 2008

The Jam: Conor Oberst, self-titled

Measure expectations into a large bowl. Strain old pretenses. Add maturity and mix well. Stir in some mysticism and Mexico. Sprinkle in new faces. Store for a month in the winter. Add mellifluousness and congruity. Check for consistency and texture among the batches. Pour into clean, simple jars with clean, simple labels.

Tastes a lot like: Peachberry Jam- It’s your classic berry jam you’ve loved all growing up but with a refreshing, tasteful twist.

After shacking up with The Mystic Valley Band in Tepoztlán, Morales, Mexico, Conor Oberst has released his first album since ninety-six out from under the perennially productive Bright Eyes banner. This past winter, Conor and fellow musicians Jason Boesel, Taylor Hollingsworth, Nate Walcott, Nik Freitas and Macey Taylor locked themselves into a make-shift studio in a villa in Mexico for a month. The outcome is a harmonious and toe-tapping collection of Neil Young-esque tracks.
Touching on the sheer fact the album was recorded about two thousand miles away from the epicenter of the Conor Oberst franchise, this album has a refreshing, nomadic, free-spirited quality. From Sausalito‘s Californian surf style easy living to the obvious good ole’ country tunes like I Don’t Want to Die. Hell, NYC- Gone, Gone is all about drifting all over the place. You get the sense of a man who wants to experience the world and walks of life- a happy ending for the sad little boy who used to indulge us with displays of depression and cynicism. Yep, it’s good to know Conor has grown up. He sounds like a man with an unwavering sense of confidence and wisdom who has finally come into his own in the world, making the most of it all and enjoying it.
And enjoying it with others. There is a euphonic feeling that hangs in the air with this album which I attribute to the Mystic Valley Band and the close quarters. Looking at Conor’s discography, “harmonious” is a word that could be used very sparingly outside of describing the actual arrangement of music. The general feeling tended to weigh heavy on your heart whereas this album is one you could throw on during a road trip without killing the whole vibe and someone starting to weep from behind their drug store Ray-Ban knock offs.
Look, it’s no Wide Awake, I ain’t gonna lie. But it is consistant with the more recent folk-county releases. It’s not even fair to be comparing this album to Bright Eyes… well, sort of. But hey, I’m willing to give Conor a clean slate, especially when he gives us quality jams.

Conor and the Mystic Valley Band are touring as we speak !!!


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