Once upon a time, I lived in a magical place.
A place where everything sounded like the beach
& everything was yours at the click of a Google.
This place was called, 2009.
2009 was the best.
It marked the first season of East Bound & Down, the burgeoning independent music blog community, Harry Potter & The Half Blood Prince hit theaters and “Sun Was High” was released, and we were all so excited because no one knew Best Coast was going to turn into a glaring embarrassment yet.
But most of all, you could download anything you wanted, from obscure 1960′s EPs to the Arcade Fire’s album that was six months from its release date.
Computer programs?
TV shows?
Movies?
Whatever!
It was all ours.
It was all mine.
Unfortunately, now all that is gone.
My computer crashed & I had only backed up 60% of my shit.
In 2009, I would have been like,
“No worries! I’ll just re-download it all!”
In 2012, I’m just like,
“WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED?!
WHY CAN’T I STEAL ANYTHING?!”
It’s a completely different world out there, you guys. I can’t just Google “70′s Afrofunk: The Revolution.zip” or “Final Draft 7 serial number” anymore. It’s horrible. My life is over. I will never be able to regain everything I took out of 2009. How am I to make summer mixes?! How am I to write my scripts?! Does the world expect me– some poor ass twenty-something who still occasionally has to suck-up her pride & get her parents to bail her out of shit & then feel like an awful Lena Dunham character– to actually pay for all the shit I used to steal?!
My world has nearly imploded!
It’s like 2008 all over again! 
The only solace I can take from that is that 2013 will be another 2009, but fucking better. I will have finally cracked this Final Draft I stole & will have written the best fucking script & gotten hired on a fucking show & will never have to blog again! I will only do it for the sheer fucking fun of it! So fuck yeah! 2013! 2012 you can’t bring me down with your fucking crazy government sanctions on the internet! You’ll be sucking my dick, internet! You too, the government! YEEEEOWWWW!!!
Sorry guys.
I’m just trying to be positive here
/ have drank a lot of sauvignon blanc, ya’all.
The thing I’m focusing most on is whether you typed out 2012 as twenty twelve or two thousand and twelve. Matters.
Two-thousand & twelve forever.
I’m so fucking excited for you to get a script optioned for what it deserves. Or to be a staff writer. I lost my shit when Molly got 2 Broke Girls, I bawled. I grew so attached to her after following her YouTube channel for years. I was never so profoundly effected by someone achieving their dream like I was then. Someone who is genuinely lovely and clever and just so goddamn deserving like her, like you. I don’t know what you’ve got in the works right now, but I can’t wait to see the earth-shattering, mad-poignant, hilarious shit you pop off. I know it’s only a matter of time.
There’s internet people rooting for you-Marissa A. Ross-is what I’m saying here. Namely, me.
Thank you so much. I appreciate it more than I am capable of accurately describing right now, being like eight scotch cocktails deep, or ever really. I’m always bad at explaining how important these sorts of messages are without coming off like a complete douche bag. So, in short, thank you. Have the best night/day/afternoon/life ever.
Woah, hold on a sec. We all loved 2009, God knows I did, but since when was Best Coast an embarrassment? That’s borderline disgraceful.
Best Coast has been an embarrassment since their full-length came out in 2010. You can like Best Coast all you want, but don’t expect to come to my blog & find the same sentiments.
Sauvignon blanc! Why are you not on the east coast so we can be friends/drunk?
SAUVIGNON BLANC YALL.
More wine time videos please!
CeltX is a free script writing program that works well for me! Also, everything is still free you just have to use the geekier world of torrentz.
That’s what I used before Final Draft and am using it again but still miss my FD.